Homestudy Anxiety

Tonight is a big day for us as we venture further and further into the state adoption program. Today, we have our first homestudy visit. In the beginning, our instructor for IMPACT told us that while we don’t have to be completely ready for children in our home, there needs to be some progress.

So, last weekend, we made some progress in turning the office into a bedroom that is child worthy. We definitely didn’t get finished, but we were able to remove a good bit from that room already. We bought the house keeping in mind that we would soon have children. So basically, we bought it with the purpose of raising a family. Fenced in back yard, small and cozy, but comfortable, enough space to grow into, great neighborhood, great school district, quiet and away from major highways… the list goes on.

Our case worker just happens to be the assistant director for the agency. They are so short staffed right now and she offered to help out where she could. A couple of other people in the agency’s office has said that she’s extremely fast. While this is exciting, it’s also scary. All the questions flooded us these past two weeks on whether or not we’re going to be ready. With a homestudy that normally takes between 45 – 60 days, how is that going to impact us getting children? Since we’ve started the adoption process, time has flown by at neck-breaking speeds.

 Out of all of this, I think I’m mostly nervous about how we’re perceived and if we were thorough enough in our self-assesments.  Will our home be perceived as child-friendly? Will my two dogs and two cats behave themselves and interact well with our case worker? All kinds of stuff run through my mind, but somehow, I know that everything will work out. We’ve already been told that we’ve exceeded what many adoptive parents do in their paperwork. My lovely wife, the crafty, OCD person she is, had to put all of our paperwork into a three-ring binder, organized so that it’s easy to look through. We’re still missing a few things, but those will come very soon.

 I think what comes with the anxiety of tonight, comes a level of anxiety that this is happening much faster than we had anticipated. We’ve been looking at children online and have found some great looking kids. Yet we have to wait to see if they will be a match for us, and us to them. While we’ve been looking at children online, there are the picnics and conferences to attend, one of them being this weekend. And right there is another level of anxiety. Will we go and fall in love with some children? Will there be a sibling group that claims us as their new mom and dad? The questions keep coming and there’s only one way to find the answer.


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