Golf, Truly A Four Letter Word


They call it golf because all the other four letter words were taken. ~ Raymond Floyd  

 Hockey is a sport for white men. Basketball is a sport for black men. Golf is a sport for white men dressed like black pimps. ~Tiger Woods 

 There are many things I’m learning, one of them happens to be golf. For many people, they don’t see the point in this game. After-all, this isn’t an exciting sport unless you’re the one playing it. Watch golf on television? I’d be passed out a lot on the weekends if I tried watching golf, let alone not get any exercise at all.

When I was younger, I swore I’d never try to play. It was never an appealing sport to me. I think George Carlin once said “Why play a sport where the name sounds like someone swallowed the damn ball?”

 Saturday was my second time ever playing the game. I enjoy it because it’s new and challenging. Right now, I don’t care about consistency and how well my aim is. I’m happier than a child in a toy store just making contact with that little white ball. Anyway, in corporate America, golf tends to be a favorite pastime; and especially so in the Atlanta area. I’m beginning to think golf is trying to become the next best religion since we have so many golf courses. Move over Scientology, here comes Golfology, where men pray to the God of clubs and the ever-so elusive Hole-in-One. Men pray by smoking their favorite cigar or pipe, while enjoying anything from a beer, to a nice glass of cognac. With all the golf courses around here, soon they’ll outnumber baptist churches!

Some of us worship in churches, some in synagogues, some on golf courses.  ~ Adlai Stevenson

 Whew, way off topic there…

 So, I didn’t do well at all, but what can I expect. The two guys I was paired up with were extremely helpful and now I want to take some time to practice at the range. My swing is rather erratic, so with some of the suggestions, I was able to make better contact. It just wasn’t consistent. Part of it could be the excitement of playing golf, but another thing I noticed is that I try to concentrate a little too hard. Plus, I need to learn how to plant my feet to the ground and use my upper body better.

 You see, I was in martial arts for quite awhile, where everything is moving. So when I take a swing at the golf ball, I tend to want to put everything I have into it, plus use the motions of my full body to achieve that goal. Not very practical, I know, but that’s my thinking. Learning to stop that habit is hard. I’m sure I’ll make improvements within time. I just had fun being outdoors, attempting to learn this odd sport. One good thing about the day was how many freebies I came home with. Free golf shirt, golf balls (including the ones I found on the course), and a $50 gift card to the club store.

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